Waiting on the Lord for a court date

Psalm 27:13-14 "I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

As we are still waiting on the Lord to bring the birth certificate for Brielle so that we can receive a court date, my heart takes refuge in the perfect plan and timing of the Lord. In my spirit I am at peace with knowledge that it will come at the right time. There is a day and a time that only the Lord knows when we will meet Brielle for the first time....then when she becomes legally ours.....then when we get to bring her home. All these moments are known by God and set in his plan. I trust Him with all my heart!!!

This trust and peace is accompanied by a groan and longing that is too deep for words.... Many tears have been sown in this season of waiting. I believe I am receiving a taste of the longing of the Heavenly Father for his children. I am so in awe of the picture that adoption is of the heart and reality of God. Experiencing the adoption process is like diving into the depths of God's love. Even though the agony of longing unfulfilled right now is great, the joy that will surely come will be much greater. I love meditating on the reality that one day there will be no more sickness and pain, and God will wipe away every tear from my eyes. The One who my heart longs for Most of all--my beloved Jesus will be with me in Glory and Fullness--never to be separated again. These windows into his heart are precious to me and bring me great comfort in my yearning.

Even now my baby girl is sick with malaria on the other side of the world and it breaks my heart that I can not hold her and comfort her and lay my hands on her as I pray. I am thankful that the Lord has sent doctors and nannies and America World Adoption friends to do those things. I believe that angels are ministering to her as well. I found at stat that said that every 30 seconds a child dies from malaria. Truly the Lord has his hand upon this precious one and has spared her life. He has a great and awesome destiny for her on the earth. Praise the Lord she was able to receive immediate medicine and medical attention!

Please pray with us that she would recover quickly and fully and that the agency representative that has been sent to expedite our birth certificate would come back with it in hand and a speedy court date would be set.

Ps 33: 18-22 "Behold the eye of the Lord is on those who fear him, on those who hope in his steadfast love, that he may deliver their soul form death and keep them alive in famine. Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love be upon us O Lord, even as we hope in you."

Happy Referral Day!!!!!

We could not be more excited that today we had the blessing of getting a referral for a beautiful 15 month old baby girl! She has the most beautiful smile in her pictures! She is so precious and beautiful and her name is actually a few letters rearranged from the name the Lord gave us for her--Brielle. We don't know what it means in her native language, but as far as I can tell online, in other languages, it might actually be derived from Gabriel (which is what Brielle) is derived from and means "God is my might!" How amazing is that?!!! I can't actually post her name or pictures until we pass court which I hope will be sometime in July. We will be traveling for court and should find out exactly when in a couple of weeks. My heart has felt like it was about to be torn from longing to see her face and know who she is the past couple of days. How sweet of the Lord to bring our referral today. It couldn't have been more perfect timing. We get to celebrate with all of the Tarr family this weekend, and then my parents are coming into town next week for my Dad's and Carson's birthdays. What a glorious time of celebration. Please pray for Brielle's health as she is on nutritional rehabilitation for malnourishment and just recovered from pneumonia. I can't wait to be able to give updates as we get them. We are hoping one of the families traveling next month will be able to take pictures of her and a care package. Thank you for your prayers and support this whole process. We are so blessed!

We are Next in line for a Referral!

Well, as far as we know, we are #1 on the referral list for our baby girl. The two precious families in front of us both received theirs today. I can't believe it! I am so excited to finally see who our Brielle is, but I trust the Lord's perfect timing. Once we get our referral, we will travel to Ethiopia approximately 4-6 weeks later for our court date. We will then return home and wait 4-12 weeks for the US embassy to process their own investigations and clear us for her visa. We will then return and get to FINALLY bring her home with us! Please pray for all the details to go smoothly and for peace and joy as we continue to wait.

We are ON DECK!!!

We got a very fun email today from our adoption agency telling us that we are officially On Deck for a referral. This means we should expect to know who our daughter is sometime within the next 3 months!! It could happen this month, but since we are still 4th on the waiting list, I think it's safer to guess it will be next month for us. We'll see!! On a fun note, I got down a blanket I began knitting 6 years ago after I had Kendra and had put up on a shelf after only doing a small amount. I felt compelled to get it down today and begin making it for Brielle! It was so amazing to get the on deck email today as a confirmation that the Lord really was prompting me that it is time to start preparing for her. The time will be here before we know it.

On that note, I am so thankful we went ahead and got our necessary vaccines for the travel. Unfortunately it was 8 shots for me and 6 for Nathan! I actually fainted shortly after and still can not lift my arms in the air without pain, but it was a labor of love. :)

We will still most likely need to take 2 trips to Ethiopia unless something changes again. I doubt we will make the cut off date for only taking 1 trip. The Lord knows his plans for us, and they will be perfect!

We will be taking TWO Trips to Ethiopia this year!!!!

We just received the news this week that the Ethiopian government has made a new law this past week requiring that families appear at "court" to testify to their willingness and commitment to adopt their child. This means that we will need to now travel 2-6 weeks after receiving a referral for about a week and then return home while the US Embassy processes our daughter's visa.

The embassy has also stated that they are going to be doing more extensive investigations into each case due to some recent allegations regarding certain adoptions and agencies (not ours) that have been in the news lately. All of these measures will ensure that Ethiopia stays open and continues to be a great place to adopt from. However this means, our time between trips will be approximately 2-3 months.

There are parts of this news that is challenging in areas like finances and logistics. The hardest thing might be spending a week with our daughter and then not getting to take her home with us the first time. I know we will have a better understanding of the heart of Jesus longing to return NOW for His bride, but knowing that it is necessary and right for it to happen in its perfect time.

We are excited that we will get to meet our daughter earlier than we would have otherwise and will get to spend a whole week with her and the other children there. We will get to spend more time getting to know Addis Ababa and Ethiopia and will have life changing adventures I'm sure.

It's possible we could get our referral in the next couple of months, so we need to start getting our shots and thinking through the first trip, as the moment we get the Big Call, life will turn into a whirlwind to make all the arrangements and prepare in a matter of weeks!!

Our hearts desire is that we would be able to pass court before it closes at the end of August. While reading comments posted on our yahoo group, I've seen that you can pass court the first time or not for many times. It all just depends on things that are totally outside of our control. We rest in that fact that this will all happen according to God's perfect timing!

Thank you for keeping our family in your prayers. We are greatly in need of them!

We're now #4 and some thoughts on the Earthquake

There is a family who just received their referral after 8 months and a week waiting. Previously it has been 9-11 months wait time for infant girls. We are now 4th on the known list for a referral for a girl. While there are surely some families we are unaware of, it seems realistic that our wait time will be under 9 months and that is exciting. I am trying to get as much done in many different areas of my life as possible during these last months of waiting. My heart wants the wait to be over, but the rest of me knows I have plenty to keep me busy in the mean time.

My heart has been very tender this week with the news of the Haiti earthquake and all that has ensued. I have personal friends who will be leaving within a week to serve there and a part of me wants to join them. The other part of me would rather do anything but go. It has been exactly 16 years since my house was destroyed in the Northridge earthquake and my life was turned upside down in a matter of seconds. By God's grace in having wonderful American engineering our house did not collapse but was close. So there is a part of what happened in Haiti that hits so close to home and at the same time does not even compare to the devastation of what is happening there. Even though I had to move overnight, my family was safe and we were able to move into our grandparents home in Nevada where we received new clothes and were cared for. It was still traumatic to escape my destroyed home and never see it again, to not get to say good-bye to all my friends and to change schools mid year in middle school. Yet my faith in the Lord Jesus-as the unshakeable one-who promised to use this for Good in my life as I trusted him was the greatest gift of all. He was my anchor of hope in the midst of a great shaking. My hope and prayer for the people of Haiti is that they will find that same hope and reality in God that I experienced. Though there suffering is so much greater than mine ever was, the Hope of God's Word and presence is just as real and powerful for them as it was for me.

To this day I hate earthquakes. Each time I have experienced one since the "big one", I think they are about to give me a heart attack. They terrify me and remind me how fast life can change--how quickly everything can be turned upside down. Yet I sing everyday, "Even though the mountains are shaken, even though they may fall in the sea, my heart will not fear. I will not be afraid, for the Lord my God is with me." This is the greater truth that I know will enable me to face whatever shakings still lie ahead of me. This is is the gut wrenching cry I have in my heart for the people of Haiti. This is the only refuge that will endure.

We're moving up the waiting list!

Well, on the "unofficial" list of our agency's yahoo group, we are now 6th in line for an infant girl referral. This does not take into account families that we may not be aware of that are not a part of this group, and thus we can not really use it to estimate our referral date, but it is still exciting to move up the list!

It is very helpful and encouraging to read the posts of all the families who are different stages in their adoptions. I am seeing both the joys and the difficult trials that we may face in the days ahead and am asking the Lord for grace upon these families who are walking a few steps ahead of or behind us as well as upon our family during this process. It still amazes me that we have our entire adoption costs almost completely covered!

Speaking of adoption costs, there is a wonderful family that have adopted a baby girl from Ethiopia and are now starting their second adoption for an older child. They are the Gibsons and they are having a great t-shirt fundraiser as well as a Christmas Give Away that ends today. I think I might have to buy a t-shirt myself. I really like them, and it would be a great way to give towards another family's adoption. I would encourage you to check out their blog. They are trying to make it an inspiring and encouraging resource for those who are considering or already on an adoption journey of their own.

I will attach the link where you can buy an awesome adoption t-shirt and/or enter to win: Christmas GiveAway Adoption Blog